So just how dumb is Maurice Clarett? Dude decides to mug a middle-aged couple at gunpoint in the only city in America where anyone would recognize him: Columbus. You have to give him some credit for having the smarts to use a gun, though. He obviously knew that if he tried to stick up the 40-year-old man and woman with a knife, they could have simply out-ran him.

I want to thank ESPN for finally giving viewers a New Year’s Eve show, and giving me one less reason to watch anything other than "The Worldwide Leader" at any point in the year. (If they only aired "Seinfeld," "Family Guy," and "24," there would literally be no need for any other channel.) But just why the network feels the need to continually shove the vexatious Stuart Scott down my throat is beyond me. Give me Bill Pidto, Roy Firestone, or hell, bring in Gene Shalit. At least none of these three would have stated that their personal new year’s resolution was that fans shouldn’t boo at sporting events. Holla at a schmuck if you see him on TV!

If anyone questions the difference in intelligence between Penn State and Florida State football players, go replay the coin flip before overtime of the Orange Bowl. When Penn State won the toss, Michael Robinson calmly and determinedly stated that they wanted to start on defense. The referee then turned to the Florida State captains, and asked them to choose a side of the field. After about three seconds of mumbled confusion, you could hear the referee say in frustration, "No. You’re on offense. What side of the field do you want?" as if he was asking his four-year-old son if he had to go to the bathroom before a four hour drive.

You really can’t blame the players, though, since their coach is Bobby Bowden. After Penn State missed their field goal in the first overtime, Bowden started walking onto the field with his head down in dejection at the same time his players were jumping up and down on the sideline behind him. Seeing this out of the corner of his eye, Bowden turned, had a Mike-Tice-trying-to-figure-out-if-he-just-won-his-challenge-esque look of befuddlement on his face, and could be clearly seen mouthing the word, "Oh." And to think everyone said JoePa was the one getting too old.